• An Uncanny Resemblance

    Updated: 2010-02-06 20:04:00

  • One Smart Pig

    Updated: 2010-02-06 17:53:00
    : skip to main skip to sidebar Saturday , February 6, 2010 One Smart Pig A travelling salesman came upon an old farmer sitting on his porch , next to the farmer was a pig with only one leg . The salesman was about to give his sales pitch when his curiosity got the best of him . Excuse me sir , but why does your pig only have one leg asked the salesman . Well sonny , I’ll tell ya . One day I was out plowing the back 40 when my tractor overturned , pinning me underneath . I was losing blood and thought I would die when that pig came running . He dug and rooted around with his nose till he got me out and he dragged me back to the house . Saved my life that pig did . 8221 Wow , that’s really amazing , 8221 said the salesman , but I still don’t know why the pig only has one leg . 8221 Well I’ll tell ya , 8221 said the farmer . One night me and the wife were asleep at about 3am when a fire broke out in the kitchen . Well that pig broke down the door , came into our bedroom waking us up and getting us out before the fire could get us , saved our lives that pig did Well that’s really great but why does the pig only have one leg Well sonny , when you get a pig that smart , you don’t want to

  • Old Folks Are Worth a Fortune

    Updated: 2010-02-06 14:31:00
    Old Folks Are Worth A Fortune.... With silver hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet, and gas in their stomaches. I have become a lot more social with the passing of the years, some might call me a frivolus old gal. I'm seeing five gentleman every day. As soon as I wake, Will Power helps me get out of bed. Then I go see John. Then Charley Horse comes along, and when he is here he takes a lot of my time and attention. When he leaves, Auther Ritis shows up and stays the rest of the day. (He doesn't like to stay in one place for very long, so he takes me from joint to joint.) After such a busy day, I'm really tired and glad to go to bed- with Ben Gay. What a life!

  • The Beaujolais Bistro

    Updated: 2010-02-04 21:45:00
    : skip to main skip to sidebar Thursday , February 4, 2010 The Beaujolais Bistro A group of 40-year-old buddies discuss where they should meet for dinner . Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Beaujolais Bistro because the waitresses there have low-cut blouses and really short . skirts 10 years later , at 50 years of age , the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should meet . Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Beaujolais Bistro because the food there is very good and the wine selection is . excellent 10 years later at 60 years of age , the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should meet . Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Beaujolais Bistro because they can eat there in peace and quiet and the restaurant is . smoke-free 10 years later , at 70 years of age , the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should meet . Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Beaujolais Bistro because the restaurant is wheelchair accessible and they even have an . elevator 10 years later , at 80 years of age , the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should meet .

  • Old age is not for sissies

    Updated: 2010-02-03 13:50:00

  • The honeymoon is over

    Updated: 2010-02-01 00:23:00

  • Senior Chat by Arthur Ritis

    Updated: 2010-01-27 03:28:00
    Be sure to check out "SENIOR CHAT" by columnist Arthur Ritis on my website. http://www.pmcaregivers.com/Arthur Ritis.htm.

  • A modern grandma

    Updated: 2010-01-27 02:48:00

  • Chocolate prevents heart attacks

    Updated: 2010-01-24 04:15:00
    I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process... It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? Actually dark chocolate bars contain antioxidants as well as the compound called epicatechin, which is a member of the plant flavoniods group. These flavoniods keep cholesterol from gathering in blood vessels, reduce the risk of blood clots, and slow down the immune responses that lead to clogged arteries. So, by eating a small amount of dark chocolate daily, you may actually be reducing your risk of a heart attack.

  • I found a real Granny Smith apple

    Updated: 2010-01-23 13:41:00

  • Perfect Eyesight

    Updated: 2010-01-23 13:36:00

  • Can cold water clean dishes?

    Updated: 2010-01-23 01:33:00
    : skip to main skip to sidebar Friday , January 22, 2010 Can cold water clean dishes John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded , rural area of Saskatchewan . After spending a great evening chatting the night away,the next morning John’s grandfather prepared breakfast of bacon , eggs and toast . However , John noticed a film like substance on his plate , and questioned his grandfather asking , Are these plates clean His grandfather replied , They’re as clean as cold water can get em.J ust you go ahead and finish your meal , Sonny For lunch the old man made hamburgers . Again , John was concerned about the plates,as his appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg and asked , Are you sure these plates are clean Without looking up the old man said , I told you before , Sonny , those dishes are asclean as cold water can get them . Now don’t you fret , I don’t want to hear another word about it Later that afternoon , John was on his way to a nearby town and as he was leaving , his grandfather’s dog started to growl , and wouldn’t let him pass . John yelled and said , 8216 Grandfather , your dog won’t let me get to my car’ . Without

  • Old people ROCK!!

    Updated: 2010-01-21 01:25:00
    : skip to main skip to sidebar Wednesday , January 20, 2010 Old people ROCK Labels : Good Reading : Reactions 1 comments : Anonymous said . By the way , use Bluetooth blocker to disable all secret transmitters in your room or at . work January 21, 2010 6:11 PM Post a Comment Newer Post Older Post Home Subscribe to : Post Comments Atom Photos 157 Jokes 137 Cartoons 58 Videos 28 Health News 25 Random Thoughts 23 Entertainment News 21 News 17 Fashion 16 Good Reading 9 Politics 6 Bumper Stickers 4 Retirement News 2 Sites that link here Seniors For Living Humor Links The Orlando Sentinel The Chicago Tribune The Hartford Courant Get my daily Blog updates on your mobile . phone Blog Archive Blog Archive February 2010 7 January 2010 24 December 2009 17 November 2009 33 October 2009 22 September 2009 26 August 2009 54 July 2009 86 June 2009 1 March 2009 2 February 2009 5 January 2009 11 December 2008 5 November 2008 6 October 2008 5 September 2008 5 August 2008 11 July 2008 12 June 2008 6 May 2008 8 April 2008 7 March 2008 10 February 2008 8 January 2008 10 December 2007 5 November 2007 7 October 2007 6 September 2007 12 August 2007 11 July 2007 6 June 2007 7 May 2007 7 April 2007 13 March

  • Juggs becoming more popular than AARP Magazine

    Updated: 2010-01-20 02:17:00

  • Looking Good

    Updated: 2010-01-20 00:51:00
    Even at age 88, my mother was vain about her looks.At a party, an old friend exclaimed, "Betty, you haven't changed in 20 years." "Oh," said Mom, horrified. "I hope I didn't look like this 20 years ago."

  • Seniors should drink plenty of fluids

    Updated: 2010-01-19 18:33:00

  • How to feel better

    Updated: 2010-01-16 00:57:00
    I am passing this on to you because it definitely works, and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives. By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace. Dr Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished."So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished. Before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of White Zinfandel, a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of chocolates! You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now. :-)

  • When I was your age...

    Updated: 2010-01-15 14:48:00

  • Reincarnation

    Updated: 2010-01-15 01:38:00

  • How to guess your age

    Updated: 2010-01-14 17:58:00
    : skip to main skip to sidebar Thursday , January 14, 2010 How to guess your age Three mischievous old Grandmas were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home when Grandpa Andy walked by . And one of the old Grandmas yelled out saying , We bet we can tell exactly how old you are . Old Andy said , There is no way you can guess it , you old fools . One of the old Grandmas said , Sure we can Just drop your pants and underpants and we can tell your exact age . Embarrassed just a little , but anxious to prove they couldn't do it , Grandpa Andy dropped his drawers . The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and to jump up and down several times . Then they all piped up and said , You're 87 years old Standing with his pants down around his ankles , the Grandpa Andy asked , How in the world did you guess slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear , the three old ladies happily yelled in unison . We were at your birthday party yesterday Labels : Jokes : Reactions 0 comments : Post a Comment Newer Post Older Post Home Subscribe to : Post Comments Atom Photos 157 Jokes 137 Cartoons 58 Videos 28 Health News 25 Random Thoughts 23 Entertainment News 21 News 17 Fashion

  • Senior Citizen Bumper Stickers For Sale

    Updated: 2010-01-14 16:11:00
    Just a plug for my Senior Citizen Bumper Stickers which are for sale on Cafepress.com. Please visit <stronghttp://www.cafepress.com/geezershop. These are high quality full color bumper stickers and priced at only $4.50 each. Cafepress charges me $3.50 so I only make a buck on each one. Please pass the link on. Thanks, Mike.

  • The Old Rancher

    Updated: 2010-01-12 19:55:00
    : skip to main skip to sidebar Tuesday , January 12, 2010 The Old Rancher A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher . The rancher's prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed . The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull . The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store . The attorney for the railroad immediately cornered the rancher and tried to get him to settle out of court . The lawyer did his best selling job , and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking . After the rancher had signed the release and took the check , the young lawyer couldn't resist gloating a little over his success , telling the rancher , You know , I hate to tell you this , old man , but I put one over on you in there . I couldn't have won the case . The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning . I didn't have one witness to put on the stand . I bluffed you The old rancher replied , Well , I'll tell you , young feller , I was a little worried about winning that case myself ,

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